I think i'm going to become obsessed with punctuation. Who knew that commas would prove such a headache??

So this isn't going quite as well as i expected. Actually the problem is probably is that it is. Not as well as i 'hoped' would be a more appropriate description. The thing is , and probably a contributary reason to taking so long to get round to starting this in the first place, that i have a need to try and justify everything i do. On the surface that's probably not that unusual, but for me the need goes deeper.Because of my 'social state' i have an overwhelming sense of failure and shame, so when it comes to doing something i don't 'need' to do, that has no greater purpose, i feel guilty, as if i don't have the right. As such i'm not so good on relaxation. Even as i'm sitting here now i'm thinking of all the other things i ought to be doing, which is a shame because i could actually write for hours if only i could find a way of it becoming purposeful.
I had a brilliant couple of hours last week when that 'responsibility' was taken out of my hands. Unfortunatly ,it was due to the horrific infestation of evil fleas that has been plaguing my house. But in attempting to find a positive in everything ,the two hours in which i was not allowed to go back inside after the the fumigation man had been meant i had two hours in which i couldn't actually do anything. So i sat on my doorstep and read a book. And it was great. I suppose it was a bit like when you're ill (as in 'bad cold' type of illness, not major pain or disease) ,when all you can do is lie on the sofa watching crap daytime telly because you can't do anything else. Except, of course, it was only for two hours and i didn't have to stomach Jeremy Kyle in the process.

First post

So i've been thinking about this whole blogging thing for a while now but its taken some time to get over my perhaps irrational ,fear of 'sharing information about myself'. i have read and reread all the privacy information, 'is this blog truly annonymous if i wish it to be?', questioned myself (as i regularly do) as to why i care, failed to come up with an answer and finally told myself to stop thinking about it so much ,and here i am. What i haven't done is looked to see if there is a 'right' way to write a blog, i briefly clicked on the help and information page but it all started to look far too complicated.So i just ignored it. i have been toying with the title aswell. This whole privacy issue i have needs dealing with someway, so i thought, fuck it, just use every word i would hate to use to describe myself (that The Daily Mail would immediatly pounce upon should i, for whatever reason become the subject of their daily, fascinatingly objective study of human society..) Yet i the thought that every time i log onto this page there it will be, staring me in the face, just in case i had miraculously failed to pass that thought through my mind that day. So i may end up regretting this title but then again, maybe i will learn to embrace it.